Higgs boson jokes

[traveller (Bo)]

Someone has to start this thread of dad/nerd jokes
A Higgs boson walks into a bar, the barman asks "what's the matter?"

Catholics will celebrate the discovery of the god particle with a Sunday Higgs boson.

Jane Fonda released a new line of exercise videos called "Feel the burn of the Higgs boson"

Over to you...

[Chris.B (Christopher)]

Higgs boson goes into a Catholic church on Sunday.
The priest tell it you cannot come in here.
Higgs bosn replies you cannot have Mass without me :-)

[silv (Annette)]

good ones

mine: new diets will follow the Boson Mass Index

[sjastro]

.... In a peanut butter jar.

http://www.ebay.com.au/itm/Higgs-Bos...3#ht_500wt_949

Regards

Steven

[multiweb (Marc)]

Originally Posted by sjastro

.... In a peanut butter jar.

http://www.ebay.com.au/itm/Higgs-Bos...3#ht_500wt_949

Regards

Steven

Those are aussie bosons. I wonder if vegemite bosons will catch up.

[avandonk]

When they make a a Bose Einstein condensate of Higgs Bosons I bet it will be a black hole!

This is not a joke but joking conjecture!


Bert

[traveller (Bo)]

I THINK I got it Bert

But is it me or is this Higgs boson hysteria of the god (damn) particle over the top

[AstralTraveller (David)]

Originally Posted by traveller

...
A Higgs boson walks into a bar, the barman asks "what's the matter?"

...

Or

A Higgs boson walks into a bar, the barman asks "What's the matter? You look like you've got the weight of the world on your shoulders"

[avandonk]

Originally Posted by traveller

I THINK I got it Bert

But is it me or is this Higgs boson hysteria of the god (damn) particle over the top

The really great difficulty is no one knows really what the gravitational force is. It is pissweak compared to the other forces. Then we have the conundrum of what causes mass.

Obviously we need mass to have gravitational effects. The Higgs boson is a mechanism we barely understand,

Like most of esoteric science we are just intelligent apes grasping for knowledge not fruit.

Bert

[marc4darkskies (Marcus)]

What did the Higgs Boson say to the Photon? ... Lighten up!

What did the Photon say to the Higgs Boson priest? ... I've never had mass.

[tlgerdes (Trevor)]

Now we have found the Higgs Boson particle will we see mass improvements in our lives?

[mikerr (Michael)]

How much per Tonne will we be taxed??

Michael.

[Larryp (Laurie)]

Quite right, Michael-hope no-one tells the pollies.

[Steffen]

Originally Posted by avandonk

When they make a a Bose Einstein condensate of Higgs Bosons I bet it will be a black hole!

But at what temperature do Higgs bosons start to condensate?

Cheers
Steffen.

[Steffen]

The force is weak in this one

[leon]

Actually i just caught up today, and have no idea about it.

But after reading all the posts, I have to agree with Bert on this one,

We area long way from knowing how we all got here, I would very much like to know,

Leon

[GrahamL]

I'm just happy to read a whole bunch of bad jokes for now
and wait and see on the really deep stuff

[ZeroID (Brent)]

My colleague at work reckons there are too many bos(s)ons and not enough workerons .....


Ok, I'll go now .....

[Baddad (Marty)]

Nice Touch Brent.

"Ok, I'll go now ..... "

I thought the joke was ok.

Hmm! Maybe I'll go as well.

Cheers