Glossary of Terms

[kinetic (Steve)]

Anyone care to add to this list ?:

Here are a few terms I think need clarifying after seeing
them misinterpreted over the years:

Collimation: The washing instructions on the tag inside the collar of a shirt.

Light years: The amount in years between mirror recoats.

Parsec: The time delay it takes Pa to answer your questions:

Newtonian: pertaining to newts, salamanders and axolotls

Nebula: A bone somehwere near the fibula and tibia

Stellar: an ex wife of Paul McCartney

Cheshire eyepiece: An eyepiece that makes you grin a lot

Steve

[AstralTraveller (David)]

Read these if you must. Sigh ....


Meteor: As in 'beef is meteor then chicken'.

Catadioptic: Being equipped with two cats eyes.

Mars: An item that belongs to ones mother.

Light Bucket: A water container suitable for the weak and frail.

Star Party: How all those young stars clustered together spend their weekends.

[okiscopey (Mike)]

How about these?

Airy Disk: general term for the proprietary 'Frisbee'.

Astigmatism: aversion to the television programme 'Top Gear'.

Astronomical Unit: any measurement not capable of being envisaged by the human mind.

Catadioptric: relating to feline spectacles (yes, such things actually exist!).

Coma: the stuff on your comb that should have remained on your head.

Dark Matter: the horrible material that accumulates in domestic ovens.

Event Horizon: Any occurrence which seems unattainably distant in time (e.g. one's next pay packet).

Extragalactic: a change in routine relating to unexpected presence of children (twins, visiting relatives, etc.)

Lunation: A country experiencing civil war.

Meteorite: Perfect weather for a picnic.

Occultation: Collective noun for a group of astrologers.

Retrograde Motion: non-modern dance routines.

Satellite: an old, folding aluminium camp chair.

Solar cycle: bicycle propelled by solar energy.

Solstice: being alone on a sunny day.

Spectrum: the bit that joins the two halves of a pair of spectacles.

Telescope: an instrument designed to reduce one's bank balance.

Zodiac: a type of marine craft; those constellations which affect rationality in the human mind.

[kinetic (Steve)]

stacked : Pertaining to female astronomers

Steve

[Kevnool (Kev)]

You blokes got to much time on your hands......

Shuttle <---- Getting the missus to get some more beers.

Cheers Kev.