Support Group for those with "AAS"

[Hagar (Doug)]

I am one of the very fortunate few by the sounds of it. Both my kids have finished Uni and have moved on to work and the like and I find myself wondering why I am allowed to spend almost whatever I wish, within reason and she is more than happy for me to spend hours outside on my own. She maintains I could be in a pub spending hours away and spending heaps on booze etc so I guess she knows where I am and what I'm doing. When it comes to star parties etc she is happy for me to go and enjoy myself while she stays home with the dog. (New Kid)(Big sook).
She is not at all interested in astronomy but is keen for me to get the most out of what I do.
Does she truely love me or is it a matter of while outside I leave her alone? Don't know but it seems to work for us both.

[jjjnettie (Jeanette)]

Originally Posted by Gallifreyboy

Well Jeanette, as a male I perceive you do have some bargaining power with regards to withdrawal of various privileges for your spouse that a family friendly site such as this will not discuss further . Don't give up what you love, just find a balance where everyone (especially you) is happy. Life is too short to deprive yourself.

I'd never use THAT as a bargaining tool.
But as you said Life is Too Short.
If you can't spend that time doing what you love, you may as well just give up now.

[Benno85 (Ben)]

Originally Posted by renormalised

I'll bet she's never bothered to ask you what you'd like to do...I also bet she's never bothered to even ask what it is you do with the scopes or even have a look through them. I also bet that if she did look through the scope and saw something spectacular, you'd never be able to drag her away from the eyepiece.

Too true mate. I think there is an inkling of potential with her though....

Often when the three of us are outside at night (mutliple loads of washing, woo hoo....) I'll ask my boy "where's the Moon" or "what's that bright light?", he goes crazy and falls over from looking straight up, and SWMBO will chip in and say "the bright light is Stupider"....

We're having a birthday party for our son in a few weeks, I'll be breaking out the cannon and letting all the kiddies have a look, hopefully she'll jump on as well!!

[toryglen-boy (Duncan)]

Originally Posted by jjjnettie

But as you said Life is Too Short.

A strange expression, that has always puzzled me.

Life is the longest thing that anyone ever does, ever.

[renormalised (Carl)]

Originally Posted by Hagar

I am one of the very fortunate few by the sounds of it. Both my kids have finished Uni and have moved on to work and the like and I find myself wondering why I am allowed to spend almost whatever I wish, within reason and she is more than happy for me to spend hours outside on my own. She maintains I could be in a pub spending hours away and spending heaps on booze etc so I guess she knows where I am and what I'm doing. When it comes to star parties etc she is happy for me to go and enjoy myself while she stays home with the dog. (New Kid)(Big sook).
She is not at all interested in astronomy but is keen for me to get the most out of what I do.
Does she truely love me or is it a matter of while outside I leave her alone? Don't know but it seems to work for us both.

It's age, Doug. Once people reach a certain age, they become comfortable with things, with the way their life is. They know their partners love them, even if they don't share that many interests. You wouldn't have gotten married if you didn't love them and by the time you get to the stage I mentioned, you know yourself everything is OK. It's only those people who are still in that "needy" stage of things that end up going through the rough stuff, wanting all the time and not being prepared to give a little in return. You can't stay under 40 (mentally or physically) all your lives. It's as the say, it's the quality not quantity that matters, and in any case you can't live in one another's pockets 24/7. That would drive you insane!!!.

[astroron (Ron)]

You've got a good thread going here JJJvery enlightening

[DJDD]

Originally Posted by astroron

You've got a good thread going here JJJvery enlightening

supportive and depressing
depending upon where you sit in the equation

[jjjnettie (Jeanette)]

Originally Posted by DJDD

i think i remember when you bought the observatory and so I thought it would be up by now.

I was given the observatory by a kind gentleman. The other half didn't want me to get it, but i got it anyway. Unfortunately, I couldn't do the work on it that it needed. So there it sits

[renormalised (Carl)]

Originally Posted by Benno85

Too true mate. I think there is an inkling of potential with her though....

Often when the three of us are outside at night (mutliple loads of washing, woo hoo....) I'll ask my boy "where's the Moon" or "what's that bright light?", he goes crazy and falls over from looking straight up, and SWMBO will chip in and say "the bright light is Stupider"....

We're having a birthday party for our son in a few weeks, I'll be breaking out the cannon and letting all the kiddies have a look, hopefully she'll jump on as well!!

Well, mate, once all the excitement dies down and you clean up after the party, drag out a chair or two, grab her and take her out to the scope and sit out there for a few hours and chill out. Whack a barlow and a 10mm ep in the cannon and point it at "stupider" and a few other targets. Let her do most of the looking. I think she just needs some encouragement and a warm arm around her to cheer her up and get her interested. I think if she appreciated it she'll come around. Before you know it, it'll be you getting dragged out to have a look at something she's found then you'll have to pry her eyes off your scope. She'll come home from work late one night with a sheepish look on her face, and when you ask where she's been she'll say "Oh, just drove past bintel on the way home. I saw a really great barlow...and bought a few things...". Then when you go to see what those few things are and find two WO 158mm refractors, two QSI 583WSG's in the back, and an order form for a 20" Planewave CDK and Sirius Obs' School Model Observatory in the glove box, you'll know where the money in the bank went

[jjjnettie (Jeanette)]

Originally Posted by astroron

You've got a good thread going here JJJvery enlightening

It helps to know that you're not alone in your situation. And if venting here can save an argument at home, that's even better.

[jjjnettie (Jeanette)]

Originally Posted by renormalised

Well, mate, once all the excitement dies down and you clean up after the party, drag out a chair or two, grab her and take her out to the scope and sit out there for a few hours and chill out. Whack a barlow and a 10mm ep in the cannon and point it at "stupider" and a few other targets. Let her do most of the looking. I think she just needs some encouragement and a warm arm around her to cheer her up and get her interested. I think if she appreciated it she'll come around. Before you know it, it'll be you getting dragged out to have a look at something she's found then you'll have to pry her eyes off your scope. She'll come home from work late one night with a sheepish look on her face, and when you ask where she's been she'll say "Oh, just drove past bintel on the way home. I saw a really great barlow...and bought a few things...". Then when you go to see what those few things are and find two WO 158mm refractors, two QSI 583WSG's in the back, and an order form for a 20" Planewave CDK and Sirius Obs' School Model Observatory in the glove box, you'll know where the money in the bank went

You're so funny Carl.

[astroron (Ron)]

Originally Posted by jjjnettie

It helps to know that you're not alone in your situation. And if venting here can save an argument at home, that's even better.

There are some benefits in being single

[Benno85 (Ben)]

Originally Posted by renormalised

Well, mate, once all the excitement dies down and you clean up after the party, drag out a chair or two, grab her and take her out to the scope and sit out there for a few hours and chill out. Whack a barlow and a 10mm ep in the cannon and point it at "stupider" and a few other targets. Let her do most of the looking. I think she just needs some encouragement and a warm arm around her to cheer her up and get her interested. I think if she appreciated it she'll come around. Before you know it, it'll be you getting dragged out to have a look at something she's found then you'll have to pry her eyes off your scope. She'll come home from work late one night with a sheepish look on her face, and when you ask where she's been she'll say "Oh, just drove past bintel on the way home. I saw a really great barlow...and bought a few things...". Then when you go to see what those few things are and find two WO 158mm refractors, two QSI 583WSG's in the back, and an order form for a 20" Planewave CDK and Sirius Obs' School Model Observatory in the glove box, you'll know where the money in the bank went

Carl you're a champion, that's a bloody crack up mate and I just got a funny look at work for having a chuckle at this!!

I nominate Carl as the IIS AAS Mediator!!!

[DJDD]

Originally Posted by jjjnettie

I was given the observatory by a kind gentleman.

that's right- i remember.

[DistroMan (Trevor)]

I got an ex racehorse years ago and Anne washed and fed him. Changed to a smaller mare after a while and Anne loved nothing better than to wrap her arms around her and give her a cuddle. She cherished my horses more than I did.

I wanted to take up bicycle riding, so of course we bought two and rode everywhere together till our bodies told us one day that we were going too far.

I joined the local Family History Society and Anne has been on the committee with me for most of the time. About 8 years now I think.

I joined the local Historical Society and Anne has sat in on more of their meetings than I have.

I joined a local political group and I get reminded that 'the meeting is on tonight, are you ready' because Anne likes to go as much as I do.

Eventually found the local Astronomical Society and said I was going to the next meeting. I could hear the sigh in the background and I immediately thought it meant 'here we go again'. But it wasn't a sigh. It turned out that it was more of an 'Oooh'. After the first meeting I said I wanted to join and got told to make it a family membership. Anne has never missed a meeting or a viewing night with me.

As far as buying equipment, the discussion is usually, 'have the bills been paid?'. 'Yes'. 'Ok then'.

Jealous much?

[jjjnettie (Jeanette)]

Very.

[FredSnerd (Claude)]

Originally Posted by DistroMan

I got an ex racehorse years ago and Anne washed and fed him. Changed to a smaller mare after a while and Anne loved nothing better than to wrap her arms around her and give her a cuddle. She cherished my horses more than I did.

I wanted to take up bicycle riding, so of course we bought two and rode everywhere together till our bodies told us one day that we were going too far.

I joined the local Family History Society and Anne has been on the committee with me for most of the time. About 8 years now I think.

I joined the local Historical Society and Anne has sat in on more of their meetings than I have.

I joined a local political group and I get reminded that 'the meeting is on tonight, are you ready' because Anne likes to go as much as I do.

Eventually found the local Astronomical Society and said I was going to the next meeting. I could hear the sigh in the background and I immediately thought it meant 'here we go again'. But it wasn't a sigh. It turned out that it was more of an 'Oooh'. After the first meeting I said I wanted to join and got told to make it a family membership. Anne has never missed a meeting or a viewing night with me.

As far as buying equipment, the discussion is usually, 'have the bills been paid?'. 'Yes'. 'Ok then'.

Jealous much?

A match made in heavan as they say

[DistroMan (Trevor)]

Anne's my bestest buddy.

[Jen]

Originally Posted by renormalised

Well, mate, once all the excitement dies down and you clean up after the party, drag out a chair or two, grab her and take her out to the scope and sit out there for a few hours and chill out. Whack a barlow and a 10mm ep in the cannon and point it at "stupider" and a few other targets. Let her do most of the looking. I think she just needs some encouragement and a warm arm around her to cheer her up and get her interested. I think if she appreciated it she'll come around. Before you know it, it'll be you getting dragged out to have a look at something she's found then you'll have to pry her eyes off your scope. She'll come home from work late one night with a sheepish look on her face, and when you ask where she's been she'll say "Oh, just drove past bintel on the way home. I saw a really great barlow...and bought a few things...". Then when you go to see what those few things are and find two WO 158mm refractors, two QSI 583WSG's in the back, and an order form for a 20" Planewave CDK and Sirius Obs' School Model Observatory in the glove box, you'll know where the money in the bank went

Well now thats something i sure could do in a flash if the funds were there


Im lucky cause im the boss here so i just do what i wanna do
If im outside freezing my butt off they all come and and see me every now and again have a quick look through the scope then run back inside again. Or i just wait till they all go to bed. Hubby is a truckie so i spend 5 nites a week doing what i like anyway

[h0ughy (David)]

Originally Posted by Omaroo

Not a problem for me any more Jeanette - mine up and left. My interest in astronomy had a lot to do with it.

Oh well - much more astronomy now.

had no idea Chris - is it permanent????

Originally Posted by jjjnettie

Mine has asked me to cut back to just one night a week and give IIS a rest for a while too.

Ahh yes - been down that track, several times.

Well some know that i have had several run ins - even a threat to leave. working things out a little however the latest is in bed before 10.30pm......damn hard i can tell you........

however it is an obsession, not a hobby so i have been told....