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  #21  
Old 26-04-2016, 11:49 PM
rrussell1962
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Maybe I'm lucky, we both got home from work at around 10 p.m this evening, I was standing in the Garden looking at the line up of the Moon, Saturn and Mars with Jupiter over in the North West. My wife said "watcha looking at?" I pointed them out, she said "Oh - neat, get the telescope out and let me have a look at them, I'll get the wine open"
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  #22  
Old 27-04-2016, 06:30 AM
el_draco (Rom)
Politically incorrect.

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You are kidding me, right?
I do all that, and more (like shopping, cooking, washing, cleaning, school run etc) , as a basic routine. I work part time from home on top. Its like being on permanent holiday... bludgy!

House work has always been the pet gripe of women but a bit of basic organisation and minimisation of superfluous junk and you can clear these tasks in a couple of hours, max. Explains to me why:

1/ Women live longer... (So much time to relax!!)
2/ It's almost exclusively women jogging and chatting to their "girlfriends" in their "active wear" on the beach.

Let the fem-abuse begin....
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  #23  
Old 27-04-2016, 07:57 AM
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Allan_L (Allan)
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In my early retirement, I got "The List".
To me it seemed like a list of what she might have done in a day (before she returned to [part time] work).

I thought, OK push through this (as a man does) and I will have a few hours in the afternoon off to myself.

Proudly announcing I had completed the set tasks for the day, suddenly the list started to get additions.

After about 5 extra items (designed to eliminate my free time) I came out with: ...

"A woman's work is never done ...
...especially when she delegates it to a man !!!"

I prepared myself for abuse, she said "What did you just say?"

Sheepishly I repeated the intended barb.
But to my surprise, she grabs a pen and writes it down.
"A woman's work is never done ...
...especially when she delegates it to a man !!!"

She loved it!
"I am going to show this to all my (girl) friends."
How true it its.

I pondered for a while and realised, this can have a different meaning, depending on how you read (interpret) the words.
"A woman's work is never done ...
...especially when she delegates it to a man !!!"
Hmmm! I chose not to reveal my original interpretation to her.

Now, this is proudly emblazoned on the Fridge for all to see:

"A woman's work is never done ...
...especially when she delegates it to a man !!!"

I'll leave the reader to take from it what he/she wants.
But it still amuses me no end. A secret I share with male visitors who see it.
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  #24  
Old 27-04-2016, 08:46 AM
Wavytone
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hehe time for some lateral thinking:

1. Get rid of the lawn. No more mowing.
2. Get rid of the clothes line, use a dryer.
3. Toss the iron and ironing board and wear things that don't need ironing. She can wear a suit over the top for her work, that will cover anything.
4. Throw out the carpet, and replace with a wooden floor, much easier.
4. Tell the cats to move out. They're only only 1 meal from going feral, anyway.
5. Buy a dozen Lean Cuisines - that's the weeks shopping done - cooking will be all over in 3 minutes and it probably costs less and is better than buying fresh anyway.
6. Consider trading in the wife with long mileage for a short lease on a new model with no residual.

With that lot taken care of you'll have plenty of time left to kill on IIS
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  #25  
Old 27-04-2016, 08:54 AM
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multiweb (Marc)
ze frogginator

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Happy wife, happy life.
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  #26  
Old 27-04-2016, 09:01 AM
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speach (Simon)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by glend View Post
I have had old women try to chat me up in Supercheap Auto, they know where to look. I guess i need to take some of Alex's good advice. It doesn't help living in an area with lots of retired people, all the married women are on the look out for stray males for their friends. Where were these women when i was in high school?
Yes as soon as I retired found that I only have to smile at a older lady in the street and she was chatting me up, much to my wife's disgust; "who are you picking up now"!!!! Why oh why didn't it happen 50 years ago?
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  #27  
Old 27-04-2016, 09:07 AM
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speach (Simon)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Allan_L View Post

I thought, OK push through this (as a man does) and I will have a few hours in the afternoon off to myself.

Proudly announcing I had completed the set tasks for the day, suddenly the list started to get additions.

Learn't never ever finish THE LIST This upsets them but finishing it really upsets me
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  #28  
Old 27-04-2016, 09:19 AM
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xelasnave
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I clean the house with a leaf blower sounds odd but really works.
Alex
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  #29  
Old 27-04-2016, 09:54 AM
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csb (Craig)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FlashDrive View Post
Wash up after Breakfast.. .. Wash up after dinner....
Your birthday is a few months away so leave hints for a dishwasher
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  #30  
Old 27-04-2016, 11:11 AM
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jenchris (Jennifer)
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Make sure the new dishwasher is 20 something with nice legs.
When I come home from work, I just put on white gloves and raise one eyebrow.
A glass of wine and dinner appear before I can reach the closest horizontal surface.
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  #31  
Old 27-04-2016, 11:21 AM
dimithri86 (Dimithri)
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I do almost all of the OP list, except for cook, and we both work. My trick is doing the work when she isn't around so I can cut lot of corners. Most of the jobs I do half as often as scheduled, and it often goes unnoticed.
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  #32  
Old 27-04-2016, 01:46 PM
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ZeroID (Brent)
Lost in Space ....

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Quote:
Originally Posted by xelasnave View Post
I clean the house with a leaf blower sounds odd but really works.
Alex
Priceless !!!!
Now I have to buy a leaf blower, that cats will love it.
Not so sure about the wife though ...

We both work, we both do the stuff at home. Some are designated, I always get the rubbish detail and with the new super vac Dyson thingie vaccing is a breeze ( but it doesn't blow ).
We both cook, whoever gets home first starts.
I manage the dishwasher and kitchen cleanup.
Ironing, nah ... forgeddit. Hang and dry works.
Washing is Mum-in-law who lives with us, she reckons it's her part to do it.
So we all muck in and it gest done fast. Then we all do what we like.
Works for us ..
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  #33  
Old 27-04-2016, 02:20 PM
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FlashDrive (Poppy)
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There's some good stories in here .....

Now I'm off to ' Centerlink ' to find a ' paying ' job...

nah ... just kidding.....

Col.....
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  #34  
Old 27-04-2016, 02:35 PM
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AstralTraveller (David)
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But I wuz promised ....
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  #35  
Old 27-04-2016, 02:48 PM
el_draco (Rom)
Politically incorrect.

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Wavytone View Post
hehe time for some lateral thinking:

1. Get rid of the lawn. No more mowing.
2. Get rid of the clothes line, use a dryer.
3. Toss the iron and ironing board and wear things that don't need ironing. She can wear a suit over the top for her work, that will cover anything.
4. Throw out the carpet, and replace with a wooden floor, much easier.
4. Tell the cats to move out. They're only only 1 meal from going feral, anyway.
5. Buy a dozen Lean Cuisines - that's the weeks shopping done - cooking will be all over in 3 minutes and it probably costs less and is better than buying fresh anyway.
6. Consider trading in the wife with long mileage for a short lease on a new model with no residual.

With that lot taken care of you'll have plenty of time left to kill on IIS
Well said, DEAD MAN...
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  #36  
Old 27-04-2016, 02:52 PM
el_draco (Rom)
Politically incorrect.

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Quote:
Originally Posted by ZeroID View Post
Priceless !!!!
Now I have to buy a leaf blower, that cats will love it.
You'd be amazed what you can do to a cat with a leaf blower.
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  #37  
Old 27-04-2016, 03:26 PM
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FlashDrive (Poppy)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by el_draco View Post
You'd be amazed what you can do to a cat with a leaf blower.


Mine scatter when I bring out the ' Monster ' ... a Dyson Vacum Cleaner.
Absolutely terrified of it they are, even when I just bring it out....they know what it is

Poppy....
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