During a visit to the mental asylum, a visitor asked the Director 'how do
you determine whether or not a patient should be institutionalized.'
'Well,' said the Director, 'we fill up a bathtub, then we offer a
teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket to the patient and ask him or her to empty the bathtub.'
'Oh, I understand,' said the visitor.
'A normal person would use the bucket because it's bigger than the spoon or the teacup.'
'No' said the Director, 'A normal person would pull the plug.
Do you want a bed near the window?'
BY THE WAY I WANT THE WINDOW BED AS I GOT IT WRONG
Last edited by supernova1965; 25-03-2010 at 02:59 PM.
One day the zookeeper noticed that the chimpanzee was reading two books-- the Bible and Darwin's On the Origin of Species. In surprise he asked the chimp, "Why are you reading both of those books?" "Well," said the chimp, "I just wanted to know if I was my brother's keeper or my keeper's brother."
A guy goes to the Post Office to apply for a job.
The interviewer asks him, "Are you allergic to anything?"
He replies, "Yes- caffeine."
"Have you ever been in the military service?
"Yes," he says "I was in Iraq for two years."
The interviewer says," That will give you 5 extra points toward employment."
Then he asks," Are you disabled in any way?"
The guy says,"Yes.A bomb exploded near me and I lost both of my testicles"
The interviewer grimaces and then says, "O.K. You've got enough points for me to hire you right now. Our normal hours are from 8:00 A.M. to 4:00 P.M. You can start tomorrow at 10:00 - and plan on starting at 10:00 A.M. every day."
The guy is puzzled and asks, "If the work hours are from 8:00 A.M. to 4:00 P.M., why don't you want me to here until 10:00 A.M.?"
"This is a government job," the inter-viewer says, "For the first two hours, we just stand around drinking coffee and scratching our testicles. No point in you coming infor that.".
