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  #1  
Old 18-04-2009, 04:53 PM
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PCH (Paul)
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Australian Women - God Bless them !

This gem was posted in a newsletter I get.....

Three men were sitting together bragging about how they had given their new wives duties.

Terry had married a woman from Greece…

He bragged that he had told his wife she needed to do all the dishes and housework. He said that it took a couple days but on the third day he came home to a clean house and the dishes were all washed and put away…

Jimmie had married a woman from Italy…

He bragged that he had given his wife orders that she was to do all the cleaning, dishes, and the cooking. He told them that the first day he didn’t see any results, but the next day it was better. By the third day, his house was clean, the dishes were done, and he had a huge dinner on the table.

The third man Bob, had married an Australian girl…

He boasted that he told her that her duties were to keep the house cleaned, dishes washed, laundry and ironing done twice a week, lawns mowed, windows cleaned and hot meals on the table for every meal.

He said the first day he didn’t see anything, the second day he didn’t see anything, but by the third day most of the swelling had gone down and he could see a little out of his left eye, just enough to fix himself a bite to eat, load the dishwasher, and call a handyman.

God Bless Australian Women!


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Old 18-04-2009, 05:03 PM
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G'Day,
Good one mate,I'm still laughing
Cheers
Arthur
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  #3  
Old 18-04-2009, 05:23 PM
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that's hilarious, hope we don't have any touchy Greek or Italian
ladies reading this.
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  #4  
Old 18-04-2009, 05:42 PM
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Lookout!!!!

You'll be accused of being the very reason why there aren't as many women as men into astronomy or on the astro fora!!!
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Old 18-04-2009, 06:00 PM
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Originally Posted by mick pinner View Post
that's hilarious, hope we don't have any touchy Greek or Italian
ladies reading this.
G'Day,
If there is, he can always change it to "Irish" ladies or "Scottish" lassie's
Cheers
Arthur
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  #6  
Old 18-04-2009, 06:08 PM
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Arthur,

the Scots might take offense - that sort of thing is considered foreplay north of the border
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Old 18-04-2009, 06:11 PM
Dingo (Karl)
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Lookout!!!!

You'll be accused of being the very reason why there aren't as many women as men into astronomy or on the astro fora!!!
well in the interest of equality, I'll share "one for the women" my wife made me read today :-)

He said to me . . . I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it
I said to him . . . You wear pants don't you?

He said to me . . ..... Shall we try swapping positions tonight?
I said . That's a good idea - you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart!

He said to me. ... What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you?
I said to him . .....Turn sideways and look in the mirror!

He said to me. ...... Why don't women blink during foreplay?
I said to him .. . They don't have time

He said to me. . How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
I said to him .. . I don't know; it has never happened.

He said to me. . Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and Good- looking?
I said to him . . . They already have boyfriends.

He said....What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
I said. . . A widow.

He said to me . .. . Why are married women heavier than single women?
I said to him . . . Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed. Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge.
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Old 18-04-2009, 06:16 PM
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It won't help, Karl....as much as you've made a fine effort to emasculate your brethren everywhere at the alter of 'equality' and harmony. Our collective sins are too great.
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Old 18-04-2009, 06:19 PM
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Arthur,

the Scots might take offense - that sort of thing is considered foreplay north of the border
G'Day,
I was going to say something similar but refrained, as there so "butch" Nth of the border.
Cheers
Arthur
Sorry Duncan
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  #10  
Old 18-04-2009, 06:25 PM
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  #11  
Old 18-04-2009, 06:31 PM
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Got a good laugh out of that .

Cheers

Mark
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  #12  
Old 18-04-2009, 06:40 PM
Dingo (Karl)
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It won't help, Karl....as much as you've made a fine effort to emasculate your brethren everywhere at the alter of 'equality' and harmony. Our collective sins are too great.
Oh well, cant say I didnt try.
Now these sins you talk of ,............. where can I sign up for them??

Dingo
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  #13  
Old 18-04-2009, 08:11 PM
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No Comment....on the grounds it might incriminate me.

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Old 18-04-2009, 08:15 PM
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[quote=Dingo;435197]well in the interest of equality, I'll share "one for the women" my wife made me read today :-)

In the interest of equality I'll share one for the ladies!

For all of us who are married, were married, wish you were married, or wish you weren't married, this is something to smile about the next time you see a bottle of wine:

Sally was driving home from one of her business trips in Northern Arizona when she saw an elderly Navajo woman walking on the side of the road.

As the trip was a long and quiet one, she stopped the car and asked the Navajo woman if she would like a ride.

With a silent nod of thanks, the woman got into the car.

Resuming the journey, Sally tried in vain to make a bit of small talk with the Navajo woman.
The old woman just sat silently, looking intently at everything she saw, studying every little detail, until she noticed a brown bag on the seat next to Sally.

'What in bag?' asked the old woman.

Sally looked down at the brown bag and said, 'It's a bottle of wine, I got it for my husband.'

The Navajo woman was silent for another moment or two.
Then, speaking with the quiet wisdom of an elder, she said:




'Good trade'.....
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  #15  
Old 18-04-2009, 08:57 PM
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Ha ha ha!!

You guys all crack me up!
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  #16  
Old 18-04-2009, 09:03 PM
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Guy had just got married and meaning to start off the way he wanted to continue he threw his trousers over to his new missus and asked her to put them on. She said that they were far too big for her. Just remember I wear the trousers around here he replied.
So she pulled of her panties and threw them to him and said put them on. "I can't get into them" he said.
Yes, and you never will until you change your attitude.



Bill
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