Perhaps you haven't been to really dark skies???
When the sky is dark, the crosshairs are very hard to see. So a little illumination on the crosshairs really does help to centre the object in the finderscope field of view.
The problem is remembering to turn off the illumination to save finding flat batteries next time one gets it out. The person that comes up with a standard screw in illuminator which includes an "auto-off" function will sell a lot!
There is the "poor person's" way. Just hold your red light torch up near the edge of the finderscope objective lens. You should be able to get enough light to see the crosshairs without obliterating your view entirely.