Well almost a complete win, it stopped again, would not start, I flicked the relay with my finger and it started. Ordered a new relay, needed the vin number to get it, and replaced it, $36.
I pulled the old relay apart, ripped the cover off, and there is a single dry joint on the PCB. It's a bit off when a single dry joint can stop a car from running, then again the thing is 14 years old
