Make sure your scope is well collimated, cooled and that Mars is above 30 degrees above the horizon. Even in very average seeing conditions I can see the darker markings on the orange disk at about 100x mag so you should be able to see it as well. Maybe glare is a problem for you, I use an aperture mask when viewing Venus or I just get a white blob. With a mask that reduces the aperture to 60mm I distinctly see the phases of Venus so try stopping down your scope on Mars - worth a try. If you make a mask try to get the holes lined up with gaps between the spider to remove the diffraction spikes.
As for nebulae, low power, dark adaption, dark skies (where are you located?) and time to look. Try averted vision but in your scope I would have thought the Trifid nebula would be easily seen and the Orion nebula would be fairly bright with even a hint of colour. Keep trying and go to a viewing night somewhere.
Keep us posted of your progress.....
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