Chris - it's a game. I can full well understand the difference between playing a game, and going out and doing "the real thing" in a real war.
There's no comparison. You can't lump every 16 year old gamer into a category that fits everyone who's ever played a "shoot 'em up" game.
You can have your opinions but not everyone has to agree with them.
With your own admission that you haven't ever played them, you honestly can't claim to be an expert on their effect on people's minds.