I have been thinking about the enorminty of this galaxy its size could be expressed as a percentage of the observable Universe

.. how can it be so big and "hold" together. If gravity acts at C how does the right hand know what the left hand is doing

and given the current view on the age of the Universe how could it grow to such a size in only 13 billion years approx. Mmmm makes my brain go numb (more than usual) Would the "space" in the gallaxy be expanding to move stars further apart? One would think not as the gravity of such a structure could be expected to overrule such... How much does it bend space time and for how far would its influence be felt?
I doubt if someone will pop up with a simple explanation I am just pondering and sharing my ponders
alex