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Very similar experiences for me to Matt's.
I grew up in aviation. I was pre-destined for aviation. And so I did. Worked for one of the world's top airlines. I very quickly realised - after getting married and having kids - that I still LOVED aviation, but for the sheer love of aeroplanes and flying and NOT as a job. As a job, I LOATHED it - no seat of the pants flying, no "fun", and always away from the wife and kids. I did not even really know our eldest daughter until she was almost 3! I would sometimes see her at bed time, but more often than not I would be kissing her and my wife on the foreheads as they slept.
I had had enough. My heart was no longer in it. The only thing holding me in there as long as I lasted was the money, but money does not buy happiness. So, one day I walked into work and quit.
So, now, I basically am Mr. Mum. I LOVE it. I fly recreationally when I feel like it - I have a few friends with aircraft I can "borrow" for an hour or so. The money we saved during my flying purchased investment properties here in Australia and in Russia, the rent of which pays all our bills and our own rent (we still have not decided where we are going to settle down - here somewhere or back in Russia). It also put my wife through 3 university degrees, and she is finishing up her Masters and Honours in 2 simultaneously (she is a HARD worker!). Meanwhile, I have plodded along, doing part-time uni, getting a Undergrad in Microbiology and doing some part-time micro work at a local lab.
The midlife crisis hit me really hard, but in the end the decision was easy, as family means SO much to me - MUCH MUCH more than anything material. I was in a mental quandary for a couple months, and I did see a psychologist once (who told me to go back flying, so I gave up on her insightful information!).
Several things became readily apparent during the transition, the most significant being how much my wife and I are for each other. Sure, at times dropping a few payscales hurts and causes issues, but in the end, we have each other, and I could not wish for a less materialistic wife!
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