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1. The plywood you want is called Baltic Birch, here in the states, anyway. I get it from suppliers that supply cabinet makers. It has many thin plies. It comes in 5X5 foot sheets, not the classic 4X8' sheets.
2. The sealer is really a presealer. It penetrates the wood and limits the depth to which the stain penetrates. You've stained softwood in the past and seen that the end grain stains much much darker. Sealer will prevent that. Sealing the wood also makes the softwood stain much more evenly. The stuff is very thin, it's like painting with mineral spirits. If you use it once, you'll be hooked. It really is worth the trouble, especially with the darker stains.
3. After the stain you'll need to protect the wood with a finish, polyurethane is probably the best. I use oil based polyurethane (not the water based) and I thin it 50/50 with mineral spirits. This I rub on with a cloth. It'll take more coats but you don't need to worry about runs or uneven coating and it makes application much easier. I drop the cloth into the can between coats. It'll give you a nicer job.
Good luck.
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