Changed direction and abandoned any hope of a snubber solution. Instead, in a moment of unusual electronic insight I decided to use ground planes to isolate analog and digital ground and went a step further adding a second copper plate for the mosfet with planes for each pin - source is connected to digital ground.
Analog and digital ground are connectd by a 100R resistor - added a power plane as well?
To be honest, I'm not certain which part of this system is most effective, but temp control is rasor sharp and images show no traces of switching events.
NO CAPACITORS... NO NOISE...
Even driving directly from the pwm pin.
Sadly, my beloved NXP mosfet broke a leg and had to switch to a StrongIRFET, which runs in the palm of your hand - no heatsink.
Thanks to everyone who helped.