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  #1  
Old 10-05-2007, 03:13 PM
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ving (David)
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dad jokes

post your favourite dad joke...
definition for thoser that dont know what one is: http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=dad+joke



Q: whats brown and sticky?


A: a stick...

(you can almost hear the forum software groaning with that one...)

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  #2  
Old 10-05-2007, 03:22 PM
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Dad: My dog has no nose!

4 Yr old daughter: How does he smell?

Dad: Terrible!!

4 Yr old daughter: <giggles uncontrollably>


I could keep my daughter laughing for 20 minutes just going round and round with this one!
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  #3  
Old 10-05-2007, 03:44 PM
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Or......

Me: Daaaaad i feel like an icecream....
DAD: Thats funny...you dont look like one!
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  #4  
Old 10-05-2007, 04:04 PM
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Dad can we go to the zoo today.

We don't have to go anywhere son, your mothers gone Ape since i bought the new scope.
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  #5  
Old 10-05-2007, 09:12 PM
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Fred: My Dog doesn't eat meat

Bob: Why not?

Fred: I don't give him any

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  #6  
Old 10-05-2007, 09:18 PM
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G'Day,
Young boy's pup has just died.

Father: It's ok Billy,the little dog is with God now
Billy: What would God want with a dead dog!!
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  #7  
Old 11-05-2007, 04:10 AM
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(A man is in the Doctor's examination room)

Man : I have a terrible pain in my side.

Doctor : Does it hurt when you do this? (poking the mans ribs)

Man : Yes!!

Doctor : Then stop poking it!

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  #8  
Old 11-05-2007, 07:35 AM
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Q: What do you call a fly without wings?

A. A Walk

Cheers all
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  #9  
Old 11-05-2007, 10:04 AM
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who could forget the classic..

it takes all night, to do what i used to do all night
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  #10  
Old 11-05-2007, 12:31 PM
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driving past a cemetary...

Dad: there's the dead center of town.
son: ... groan
Dad: must be popular
son: why?
Dad: cause people are dying to get there!

boom boom!
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  #11  
Old 11-05-2007, 02:50 PM
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What do you call a fly with a hundred teeth?

A zipper!
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  #12  
Old 11-05-2007, 03:52 PM
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Did you hear about the guys who tried to rob a bank in Canberra?
They were caught in the ACT.
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  #13  
Old 12-05-2007, 07:15 AM
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An old guy is about to celebrate his 90th birthday , and all his mates at the nursing home decide to get him a hooker as a big suprise.
The day of his birthday arrives and theres a knock at the door . The old fella gets up , walking frame in hand and answers the door, There standing before him is a gorgeous blonde, huge knockers , dressed in a nurse outfit " Hi grandpa !" she gushes " im here to give u super sex !"
The old fella thinks for a moment then says " Great !, i'll take the soup !"
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  #14  
Old 12-05-2007, 10:48 AM
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Oh hang on , that may not be a Dad joke
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  #15  
Old 14-05-2007, 07:31 PM
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Dad Joke Numero Uno

Quick - pull my finger....
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  #16  
Old 14-05-2007, 09:37 PM
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Why don't cannibals eat clowns?
They taste funny.

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  #17  
Old 15-05-2007, 11:32 AM
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Hi John, I nabbed my godson with that when he was about 6, he laughed so hard he wet himself now I have ammo on him for his 21st.

Cheers
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  #18  
Old 15-05-2007, 01:38 PM
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lol! is this thread still going!
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  #19  
Old 15-05-2007, 08:41 PM
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Yep, Ric, that's right. There are a couple of things which are timeless when it comes to jokes - burps and farts! It doesn't stop with six year-olds. Try a class full of grade 8 boys...that's the main reason why smoking was banned in schools...the whole place would go up in one giant methane explosion.

The first time I came across the "pull my finger" joke was with Bill Cosby quite some years ago.

Cheers and happy joking!
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  #20  
Old 15-05-2007, 11:22 PM
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True story - A group of Psychologists did research on what constitutes a funny joke.
Their research discovered that if you include a Duck in your joke, it is funnier!

And these guys get paid to find out these things?

Lets test their theory:

Why did the Chicken cross the road?
It thought it was a Duck.

Nope, wasn't funny, and it had a Duck in it
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